How to Fight Dumping and Divorce in Today’s World

With the statistics of divorce being so high, the idea of ‘staying together’ can be almost impossible to imagine. For those who are in a relationship or already married, the fight is not over yet.

First, you decide. You decide that this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with…even when things get bad. In order to make this decision, you have to be in a good place at the time. If you’re in a negative frame of mind, sick, upset, emotionally unstable at the time, you won’t be making the decision from your head and heart. You are not able to make a good decision because you are too emotional at the time. Wait until you feel better or you’re more in control of your feelings; then decide.

Now, the real work comes into focus. This is when you need to tighten up your belt and be ready for anything. There are going to be many bumps along the way, and there may be days you feel like throwing in the towel, but you have to stay focused. Focused on the vow you made to yourself to keep it going.

Eventually, whatever was happening that made you question your decision will pass, and your feelings and thoughts of wanting to be in that relationship will return. If you stay aware of your emotions during the moments where you wait to decide, you learn that
tough times are always going to invade your space, but you know the negative thoughts will subside and love will prevail.

Of course, there are exceptions to this process, like cheating and abuse, where you probably should have made a different decision to begin with, but for most couples out there, the bad weather suspends and the flowers, once again, begin to unfold.

Give your relationship the break that it needs to make good, clear decisions before you regret the outcome. The grass is not always greener on the other side, and you may find it needs a lot more watering. Stay focused…and do your part to make the relationship work.

To read more on dating, relationships, family and friends, check out my book, Loving with Purpose.

4 responses to “How to Fight Dumping and Divorce in Today’s World

  1. I think it’s when it completely breaks down that they realise they do have to get up and fight.. then it’s too late because in your heart and mind you have moved on.. 😦

    • Yes, I agree. The problem starts when the communication breaks down. It’s so important to tell the person how you feel, so they at least get a fighting chance to fix the relationship. When we wait until we are done with the issues (or perhaps not afraid of the consequence of what we say) that’s when we finally state our true feelings. Unfortunately, what we wanted a few months or years ago has now started to change. I think it’s unfair to us and the other person when we consider a relationship done, if we haven’t worked hard and became vulnerable enough to tell the truth about what we expect from them. Having expectations to begin with helps alleviate some of the drama that goes on in relationships, too. All the best jinpoot!

    • Very true. The best you can do is your part. If the other person doesn’t care if it works out, perhaps it’s because they don’t realize that you are ready to walk if they don’t. Do your best to have a plan, talk to them about what you are trying to do to make it work, and continue until there’s no hope. Sometimes the other person needs to understand the consequences and how they are making the relationsihp break down before they will get up and start fighting for it. Some people do stay together for the sake of ease, but hopefully most people do care…they just don’t know how to go about making it better. Good luck to you. Thanks for the comment.

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