With the statistics of divorce being so high, the idea of ‘staying together’ can be almost impossible to imagine. For those who are in a relationship or already married, the fight is not over yet.
First, you decide. You decide that this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with…even when things get bad. In order to make this decision, you have to be in a good place at the time. If you’re in a negative frame of mind, sick, upset, emotionally unstable at the time, you won’t be making the decision from your head and heart. You are not able to make a good decision because you are too emotional at the time. Wait until you feel better or you’re more in control of your feelings; then decide.
Now, the real work comes into focus. This is when you need to tighten up your belt and be ready for anything. There are going to be many bumps along the way, and there may be days you feel like throwing in the towel, but you have to stay focused. Focused on the vow you made to yourself to keep it going.
Eventually, whatever was happening that made you question your decision will pass, and your feelings and thoughts of wanting to be in that relationship will return. If you stay aware of your emotions during the moments where you wait to decide, you learn that
tough times are always going to invade your space, but you know the negative thoughts will subside and love will prevail.
Of course, there are exceptions to this process, like cheating and abuse, where you probably should have made a different decision to begin with, but for most couples out there, the bad weather suspends and the flowers, once again, begin to unfold.
Give your relationship the break that it needs to make good, clear decisions before you regret the outcome. The grass is not always greener on the other side, and you may find it needs a lot more watering. Stay focused…and do your part to make the relationship work.
To read more on dating, relationships, family and friends, check out my book, Loving with Purpose.