The Goals of Dating

As with many coined phrases, such as “If I always do as I’ve always done, I’ll always get what I’ve always got,” we see the common sense of the expression. Still, we don’t always follow the path that leads us to the right outcome. Perhaps we complain about our situation, growing the problem as we continue the drama of talking about it, or maybe we lay dormant, expecting the issue to just go away, while life continues to pass us by. Whether it is a relationship, a career change, or those other choices we make in life, we all have to land somewhere. 

When thinking about the dating scene, and considering the saying “If I always do…,” it can give great encouragement to create change when on a rocky road to somewhere. If you find yourself dating the same type of person, over and over again, and the situation never works out, perhaps there is something else you could be doing to make a change.

If the idea of making a goal list sounds familiar, that’s because it works. Having the ability to see, on paper, what makes you tick (happily) is to do what the leaders do in business. Make a business plan! 

If you take the time to make your list of standards, that inventory does two things for you. First, just as in business, it creates a goal—a place to go. How many businesses do you know still do this today? It must be because having a plan works—that is, of course, if it’s a good business plan. Second, as you consider what you are doing in the process, your anticipation should begin to build as you consider the possibility of a new beginning, your adrenaline gets your mind flowing, and your thoughts then begin to pour out into the universe. Now you have the universe working in your favor, too. Everything is as it’s meant to be. Both of which are crucial for obtaining success in life. 

Once you begin writing your list, consider what you want from those you are dating. Do you want respect, patience, good looks, financial success, chivalry, or kindness in a mate? Only you can determine the factors that are important to you.

While you begin writing, don’t worry about prioritizing each item—just keep writing. Then, once you feel you have a good start, put them in order, leaving space between each one for you to add extras as you move forward in your dating process. With each new date, you will find more characteristics that are important to you. Keep your list handy, in a certain drawer or on a mirror, so you can continue to reflect on whether those dates are meeting your requirements. If you make a plan to get somewhere in particular, you can stop the “…I’ll always get what I’ve always got” syndrome.

Think of what really matters to you and what you want out of a relationship. Simple characteristics like personality, loyalty, trust, appearance, and peace. Notice I said peace. Perhaps not something you would think to write, but one which will make you heave a heavy sigh during times when patience is needed. Peace will become so important in the grand scheme of things. Choosing someone who pays attention to what makes the relationship work will give you more peace.

Still, know a goal list will help you to accomplish your dreams of today—one item at a time. It’s never too late to start. Focus on what you really want and go out and get it.

To understand more on what you are doing to create your situation, please read the article, What Are YOU Doing in the Dating Process?”

Kimberly Mitchell

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One response to “The Goals of Dating

  1. Pingback: What Are YOU Doing in the Dating Process? « Loving With Purpose·

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